I got another PB at spin class this week (and just to show off, another at Park Run Saturday morning by one second). What seems extraordinary to me is that only a couple of months ago after the Labrador bite, I was lying on my lounge wondering what the point to life was. Why was it so hard? Do I matter? What’s my purpose? Is it worth it? Will I ever feel good enough? But now I am doing things I never imagined I would ever do in my life. I bounced back.
But I got really excited when I realized that the tough stuff I’ve been through mentally enabled me to push my physical barriers. Knowing I succeeded pushing my mental limits gave me confidence to also test pushing some physical limits I placed on myself. To let go of my belief – “I’m 47 and only average, I don’t do these sorts of things, I only walk, running is too hard, I hate running”. I thought ‘other’ people did these things. But suddenly I am being one of those ‘other’ people. I am giving things a go. Getting better at them. Planning my Fridays with no going out and no drinking so I can do Park Run first thing Saturday morning. And that seems silly at the time but when it’s over you feel like such a hero for the rest of the day and I wouldn’t give away that incredible feeling for anything. The sacrifice is worth the result. I feel like a better person.
The bad things helped me to change my beliefs. Here’s some new ones I am trying on for size (and they feel so much better than the old ideas in my head about being average and that life is hard!):
- I AM a runner
- I AM a life coach
- I DO make a difference in people’s lives
- I am worth it
- I am enough
- I am deserving
- I am prosperous
- I am abundant
- I love life
- I enjoy trying new things
- I can and do push through my fears
- I am expanding my horizons
- I choose new thoughts
- I look forward to every day with joy and anticipation
- I look forward to challenging myself with joy and anticipation
So I feel I am not who I used to be. I am new. I am different. I am a better. I believe in myself more. It feels great. And I think that just maybe I have the dog bite to thank for some of this. I survived that (mentally it was a much bigger struggle than the physical) and it allowed me to realise I am stronger than I think. More resilient than I think. And able to cope with stuff I didn’t think I could. (I still sit here shocked to think about the first time I had to peel off the bandage and clean up everything and put on a new one – I really didn’t think I could do that. But I did.)
We bounce back. I bounced back after Mum died. I bounced back after I wasn’t overnight success in a new business. I bounced back after being bitten by a dog. I bounced back after relationship breakups. I bounced back when friendships changed. I bounced back after dark days wondering what the point was.
And I bounced back better than before after these things. I would not be achieving what I am right now without all these things. They all taught me lessons that have allowed me to get further out of my comfort zone and reach bigger goals.
I love this quote by Hall and Brogniez in Attracting Perfect Customers which says ‘Breakthroughs often look like breakdowns at the start.’
What if we remembered that sometimes it’s the bad things that happen in life which show us the way to something better. That remind us how far we have come. Feels so much lighter seeing it that way. Makes the crappy things possibly have a point. I know it helps me to realise that so much more just might be possible.
Be kind to yourself.
Wax
